The Coolest Cheap Home Improvement Project EVER

So this lady drew her own wallpaper. I cann't believe how cool this is (and that I've never thought of it myself!) It's so fantastic, I'm lurking all around my condo trying to find a place I could give it a try. Needless to say, I WILL be trying this in whatever house we eventually move into. See her amazing pics here.

Chocolate

I've determined that my problem is not sugar in itself - it's chocolate. I, quite simply, cannot function without it.
I have tried staying home for entire days with my child, and if the chocolate bus starts buzzing - satisfying it with greek yogurt and honey, or a popsicle, or whatever else kind of sweet is in the house. But by the end of the day, I'm like a crack addict without her crack and I'm spending the whole late afternoon/evening trying to come up with an excuse to go to the store and get some.
Many days, that there is no chocolate to eat is a good enough excuse.
So, here's what I'm thinking. Keep chocolate in the house. Sounds easy and terrifying, right? What if I do it this way....
I jones for my fix especially during H's naptime and in the evening after she's asleep. So, what if I allow myself a bit (no really, a bit - I can't honestly allow myself a whole # each time, can I?!) at both of those times. I can buy a bar (or whatever) a day, and split it between those two times with a gigantic glass of water. What do you all think? Can I make it work, appreciate the tiny indulgence to prevent the monster addictive binges? Thoughts?

new blog

I spent the whole day today putting together a new blog for a project I do for my church. If you're curious, you are more than welcome to check it out at:

faithfulthoughtsforparentsoftots.blogspot.com

thanks ;)

So Proud!

I just made this crayon roll for H! I'm not a seamstress {yet!} but thanks to soulemama and her book The_Creative_Family I was able to trust myself in making this simple yet fabulous piece!

what a day

Well, since I've been up since 5:55 this morning, still haven't had any coffee, my toddler keeps yelling nonsense at me while banging on the piano, and it's pouring outside, I thought I'd share my 2 new favorite items with you. I've only seen these pictures, not the fabulous items in person, but they calm me regardless. The top is a pillow from anthropologie and the next is a quilt some wonderful person made. Don't they make you want to snuggle up with them and ignore anything other then their georgousness?

me, too.

it's like New Post night!

This evening I've been reading a bunch of back-blogs by this woman Anna_Marie_Horner. She sounds so cool! She's a mother of 5 (with #6 due this week) and she is an awesome fabric designer { see her cool stuff here}. Anyway, going through her last 3 months of posts, I was inspired to pull out my fabric bag and do this:So it's not magic or anything, just reminding my boring living room that I love patterns and color. I've been playing around with the idea of making new covers for some of the throw pillows (I know it's easy to buy new pillows, but I just need to honor James' hard work by sticking to a budget - plus, it's dentist time for me again, and I'll need the $). So anyhow, here's one way to visually remind myself who I am, and what I appreciate :)

These are wee wonderful dolls, a downloadable PDF pattern you can purchase for $15 here . They are so freaking adorable, and I really really want to get the patterns and make some for H. The file includes patterns for 3 different dolls, 4 outfits for them, and a pair of shoes. You can make them however you want - with the same eye and hair color of their little owners, with adorable dresses you'd wear yourself (if you had a 6" waist). I think they're great. You can see different ones people have made here.

Reusing What We Have Already

With James being the manager of our condo complex, he is often putting up postings in entryways for the other residents to read. When we asked the board if we could take the old updates and print the new updates on the backside, they decided they'd rather have new crisp sheets of paper each time. Well, I guess that's for a professional aesthetic, so instead we buy the 80-100% recycled printer paper when we can.
But, yesterday, when H and I were taking down old updates I thought, this is still a lot of paper (27 entryways with 3 sheets of paper each!) - waht can I do with this? So, I created these " coloring books" for H! They're not the cutest but they will get better since this was the first attempt. I either folded the paper so the printed on side was hidden, or taped 2 pages printed side together. Then, I stapled them into books and "bound" them with electrical tape (it was what I had on hand).
H is only 22 months, so they'll get scribbled on, torn, and virtually end up in the recycle bin, but at least I don't have to buy coloring pages for a while!

See, she's already enjoying them!

Poor Hazel

Tonight, James put her to bed, and she was not into it. 20 minutes later she was still screaming, so I went in to see if she was alright. She had somehow managed to turn out her nightlight, so it was completely dark in there! Then by the time I got the light back in place, I sat down next to her and (perfect timing) she started vomitting :( Poor thing had cried herself sick! Luckily, I caught what was about to happen, and I caught and contained all the mess. So after a quick and quiet jammie change, we snuggled and read a few books to calm her back down.

Now, I'm in the living room, listening to her cry mommy, mommy... it's so hard! But the cries are getting more mellow and the moans are getting groggy, so hopefully she's nearing the end.

Watching your little one grow up on you is as equally moving as it is heart wrenching. I want her to need me, and so it's so easy to declare, 'her cries are because she needs her mommy!' but really, she's old enough now that she can attempt mini-manipulation {since mommy came last time I cried myself sick, let's see if she'll come back}. I have to allow her to grow up and teach herself to fall asleep without my presence. I'd say in general I've been pretty okay with her growing older - it sure is great she can use so many words to talk to me now, and she understands consequences, can help me with little chores, plays hilarious games with me, and just this week, she started asking me to play guitar for her while she sings and plays at the piano - it fills me up overflowing!
But I also long for the days when I could snuggle with her for hours - when she was little and completely content with me meeting her every need. Now she says, 'mommy, no hand' when I want to hold her hand walking through the park. Or, 'no buckle' when she wants to snap herself into her highchair/stroller/carseat (which I check, of course!).
Ahh.... she's quiet now. Thank you God for the gifts of life and love (and peaceful evenings!).

Toddler Bed Night #2

WOAH!!

H cried 5 minutes and crawled her rump back into bed, snuggled into her pillow, and fell asleep!

What a big girl!!

I think I might cry.....

Toddler Bed

Today, after a couple of conversations with different friends, we decided to convert H's crib into a toddler bed. Boo-hoo! But, as you can see, she already loves it - she's been snuggling in it all afternoon and LOVES that she can get in and out all by herself!

Our plan is to put the baby gate that used to keep H out of our room so that Cats could have a toddler-free space, in front of her door so she can't come out. I'll let you all know how it works out!

I {heart} Consignment!

Today, H and I met a friend and her daughter in Issaquah for a fun filled errand running playdate. We met at the local SAHM Headquarters (aka Starbucks) and wandered over to the neighboring kids consignment shop - Me n' Moms. First important thing: Me n'Moms has a new owner - and so far she's fabulous! She has begun rearranging the shop, and the first thing she's done is get same sized long racks for the clothes, and organize them into a girls section and boys section and in order of size. Thank God! Now, when you browse, you can see over the tops of all the racks to find your running kiddo (or under the racks - there are now no toys stored beneath the clothes, so you can see your pint-sized shopping partner that way, too!). As I was chatting with the new owner, she said they were going to do more - putting the used toys all together in a section you could see from the whole shop and kids could play in, painting, getting in cool new things (like the whole entire See Kai Run line!) and adding community activities (storytimes, mom's night out with free wine and cheese, and baby wearing classes for a start!). She is renaming the store Small Threads (super cute!) and there will be a website and everything. As you can tell, I am really excited. She seems super cool, and (though I don't yet know her name) I think we might become friends :)

Anyhow - so during our time there, I found some sweet things for H. My friend, Kari, always wonders how I find H's cute stuff (Kari's baby Sonja loves the hand-me-overs!) and this is how - browse until my eyeballs fall out or H throws a tantrum! lol

Here's what we got - totalling under $20!

These are so cute! The top is hand embroidered and has no label. The shorts are OshKosh (and I saw them in the store literally last week full price) and the shoes, and a european brand!

My friend Ruth, who was with me, so knows my style. She saw this skirt and pulled it for me. Trendy red, brown, and turquise - yummy!
This one, too, is handmade by someone's grandma - hilariously adorable, almost inappropriately old print, but I thought I might die if I didn't get it for her!
We also picked up some Old Navy flower embroidered jeans in 3T size for next year. Yeah! And like I said earlier, all 6 items totalled under $20! Go Small Threads Consignment!

job continued.....

last night, before i went to sleep, i talked with a friend about this potential job. he said i shouldn't make a decision until i had slept on it - see what i would dream about and if it kept me up thinking. but i pretty much had made up my mind to leave the job be, and not go for it, so i didn't sit up all night, and i slept dreamlessly well.

today, however, i spoke about the job at length with multiple people, and my mind went yes and no and yes and no and wait and no and yes and wait. what was that?

and it hit me (thanks to a lunch friend, and an evening friend) - i am forcing what is in front of me and within reach to fit my needs, not offering my call where it might best fit.


my mind is racing about how foolish i have been running around, asking questions, choosing my own destiny, and not stopping to pray about any of it - only going going going..... and this evening james and i sat, talked and prayed it through, and it hit me. this call that i've been trying to push aside the last 2 years, that i've been avoiding by filling the space with desires like more babies, getting james through school unscathed, settling in at a new church, this call that i so desperately long for and loathe is not willing to wait for me to be ready any longer. my call wants to be made clear and known and acknowledged, and i am completely unwilling to let it in.
i know this because i cried.
i cried the tears i have cried in the past when i know god is working in and on me and it hurts because i have built the walls up so firm and tough to keep god out yet it's so easy for god to crumble them down. i cried the ridiculous and gasping wails of a baby w ho doesn't know when she will be fed - she only knows she's hungry and can't control circumstances keeping that food from her. i sobbed knowing that i could no longer keep god carefully and convieniently at arms length in a safely labeled cubby, and that i would have to start caring again.
i loved being able to say no and pick up a book or watch a trashy reality tv show - i loved letting the caring be left to someone else, only talking theology like it was politics, and feeding my mind with theories, leaving my heart to starve. it was/is simple that way. but i cried, because i know it can be no longer.

because i've been keeping myself from acknowledging my call, i still can't yet say what it is in entirety. but it involves a few things for sure:

* a need to participate (actively and in planning/facilitating) in adult education/faith formation in my church instead of children and family programs (which i've never been fond of, and think i just fell into at HSLC because i have a child and family)
* more education. likely a Master of Arts in Transforming Spirituality from Seattle U

i have sharp feelings about these things for many reasons (probably a good factor in why i have been avoiding call), many are reasons i feel i'm not ready, many involve the people that count on me to be in the places i am now, and many are because i don't want to go to Seattle U.


but, tonight, i can't sleep, and i think about my friend saying, if you're up at night thinking of things that are exciting you then they are worth the thoughts. now if only i could recognize what parts are exciting, and what others are just pieces i'm trying to fit where i feel they belong.....

gosh, such a ramble...... hopefully i'll get more clear (in my writing and in my thoughts!) as this journey rolls onward!

job.....

so, a dear friend just suggested i apply for the youth director position at our church.
for those of you who know me, what do you think? the church is a progressive community {the reason we choose to go there} and i'm not exactly {or really at all} a "typical" youth director.... however, my friend had some good reason for me to apply.
i've started this ministry at church called spirited.home that lends itself to multiple situations as a discussion starter. i could do some really cool things with youth - i've always been someone that "youth" are attracted to and willing to talk with. i dunno........ i have to read the job description....... more later!

Housewives.....

has anyone other then me noticed that there are all these shows with "housewives" and none of them are actually housewives?!?!? the most humorous part, in my opinion, is that ABC's "desperate housewives" is the ONLY ONE! {disclaimer: it is also one of my FAVORITE shows so.....} bravo network has a long list of "real housewives" reality shows {which i admit, i also watch almost as religiously} orange county, new york, atlanta, and next new jersey - and i have yet to see an actual housewife! every single one of these ladies has some kind of work - and even those who can work from home (jewelry designer, author, skin care line creator, whatever else) they all have help! people-what does it mean to be a housewife to you? i would never really believe these examples!

before:after

yesterday: sicko kiddo with elmo

today: pushing a colored pencil, mcdonalds toy, and banana rounds all around the house!

wouldn't it be nice if we could be as swiftly rehabilitated?!

sick-o's

last night we had a couple of sick-o's up in here :(

james has had a flubug for a few days {and actually stayed home from class this morning for the first time EVER!} and H has had a crusty/drippy nose for the weekend. last night, H went down for bed fairly normal around 745ish, but then just before james and i were to hit the sack she started scream-crying. now, normally, if she wakes up and crys or moans, we leave her be and she puts herself back to sleep within a couple of minutes.... like i mentioned before, last night they were scream-cries. so, like any good parent who thinks their child is dying or close to fatally injured when they hear that noise, we went in.

she was REALLY upset, and crying like i've never seen before, so since it was midnight and we live in a condo with {very} close neighbors, i let sick-o james go to bed and i took H out to the dark living room and snuggled on the couch with her watching an elmo episode.

however, H did not reallly settle down - she was still moaning and generally sounding really hurt - i tried giving her some warm milk, whatever. then, she puked - really puked, all over herself, the couch, the toss pillows, whatever. poor sick-o kiddo :( no wonder! after cleaning her all up, i took her to the chair in her room and started to read her a story, but she was out 30 seconds after we opened the book. mommie got to go to her own bed around 230am and H didn't wake up this morning til 9.

today is looking a little better, H's watching yo gabba gabba and playing with some toy cars {ooh, as i write this she's finally drinking a little watered down juice!}. wish us luck today - it's BEAUTIFUL outside, and i'm not sure we're gonna make it out the door!

blogs....

i must admit - i've been really loving reading all these blogs recently! My favorites are here, here, here, and here. i am inspired to write about ALL things now, the wonderful meals i prepare, the crafts i attempt, the parenting trials and joys, favorite links - and pictures....... these ladies feed my hungry eyes with georgous photos of any and everything. i LOVE it!

So, let's start with this AMAZING dish i made friday night for dinner. i recently got this cookbook, real food for healthy kids and it's really good (in my opinion, much better then it seems!). the dish i made was the chicken cherries jubilee with goat cheese - yummy! even H enjoyed it (she's been in a major toddler eatting stage where she doesn't eat..... she just likes to drink). here's a basic rundown of what it was:

4 chicken breasts, sliced horizontally and stuffed with 1 oz goat cheese per breast. season with salt, pepper, and sprinkly each breast with 1 tbs flour. saute in olive or grapeseed oil about 6 min each side and remove from pan. saute 1 finely chopped shallot for about 1 min in same pan used for chicken. add 1 cup chicken stock, and 1 lb dark cherries with their juice (i used frozen ones i thawed in the microwave and the "juice"). season to taste and boil til reduced by half. you pour the sauce over the chicken, and whalaa - DELICIOUSNESS in 20 minutes or so! we served it with steamed sugar snaps, and i might add some brown rice next time. i wish i had taken a picture for ya'll - it was worthy. this will be what i make for whomever is our next dinner guest!

on the crafting front, i am a little frusterated because i have begun this beautiful tunic apron TWICE now, needing to pull it all out and start all over again! the first time, i had too few stitches, the second time, too many - so this next time, i will not forget stitch markers - however annoying they might be, they WILL stay in place the WHOLE PIECE! errr....... but i think it will be worth the trouble in the end, it's pretty isn't it?!

in the meantime, i want to finish a pretty and perfect square for H's quilt before i attempt to cast the apron again...... here's what i've got so far...........

and finally, since easter was last week, and there was no sunday school, our ITSS met for "easter" this morning. i had made an "alleluia box" before lent with notecards i had written "ALLELUIA!" on. the point was that during lent, we choose not to speak or sing that word so when the joy of easter arrives, we can savor it and shout it (with excitement similar to tasting chocolate or caffeine for the first time in 45 days!) well, since today was the first ITSS after easter, the kiddos were able to open the box and here's what they found:

each kid was able to take 1 set home (sorry moms and dads!) and the rest will stay in the classroom to be used whenever we sing our alleluia songs :)

well now. here's what (hopefully) my blog will be. i have enjoyed posting this evening - hope you enjoyed hearing what i'm up to!

tattoos.....

I've been long thinking about my next tattoos. I have one, I got it really soon after my 18th birthday. I don't regret it, it's nice, but I have spent almost 10 years (yikes!) thinking about my next one. Tattoos are permanent people. That means FOREVER! I don't want to look at something on my 90 year old body and think, "yeah, about that decision.....oops!" So, here's what

I've been thinking of.....

I have wanted Luther's Rose for a long long time. I have just been spending this time trying to determine where I want it placed. I think I've decided that I want it on my inner arm, just under my left elbow crease. But, I can't decide if I want it in color or black and white. You see, I don't usually like too much color, and the colors in the rose aren't my personal style, but they have meaning in the description of the seal. So.....

Then there is this one, the simple yet powerful words of God, that I would like small (to keep it as a personal reminder) right on the inside of my right wrist, so that when I turn my hand up, it can be read by me.*

*sorry for the tacky pic. it's hard to find exactly what I want here.....

And then, as usual, there are always other great images that I would like to see as a tattoo, but I am not as invested in the meaning behind them. Maybe I should ask for one of these for mother's day.......

Lenten Discipline

The forty-day season of Lent derives its name from the Latin word for “lengthen.” During Lent, the days grow longer as the world prepares to reawaken into spring. Lent recalls the forty days and forty nights Noah and his family spent on the ark, the forty years of Israel’s wandering in the wilderness, and the forty days of prayer and fasting that Jesus spent in the desert. Focused on the Easter promise of new life and renewed faith, Lent invites us to look honestly at ourselves as we seek to be strengthened in the call to be Christ’s disciples.
The Character of Lent as a time of renewed commitment and service suggests many possibilities for families. My family has agreed to this commitment:

We (or rather I, since I am this family's chef and personal grocery shopper) have chosen to "use what we have and buy what we need." Now, to translate this it means that our refrigerator, freezer, and pantry holds only items we intend to use, and anything else we buy to eat must be intentional and with purpose. I often go shopping with a list, and I get everything on that list (plus more, obviously, when has there ever been a SAHM who actually isn't hungry while grocery shopping?!), but my list usually consists of things my family is craving, with some essentials in the mix. The day I go shopping, everyone is happy with what's in the cupboards. The next day, oatmeal doesn't sound good for breakfast and there is no cereal. Or, yogurt with dried fruit sounded like it could never go wrong, but that Greek yogurt parfait at Starbucks sounds so much better - you know, with the honey and macaroon granola, dried cherries, and pumpkin seeds. So, I go to the store (because it's so much cheaper to buy the ingredients myself and make it, right?) and buy dried cherries, Greek yogurt, honey, granola, and pumpkin seeds, and after a serving or two, I forget these ingredients are even in the cupboard, and they sit and sit, wasting away.

So what am I trying to do differently now during this Lenten Season? Well, I won't go grocery shopping. Instead, I have inventoried my cupboards and freezer, and sat down with my list and my favorite cookbook, "More-With-Less - suggestions by Mennonites on how to eat better and consume less of the world's limited food resources" and find recipes I already have a majority of the ingredients for. Then, I go to the grocery store and purchase the two or three things I need to complete the dish, and go for it. We have been having some interesting combinations for meals - Peruvian pepper chicken with Thai rice, garlic naan, and Caesar salad for example, but who does it hurt? We are trying to feel the possibilities of being blessed with using little and giving more. Our family survives on a $300 monthly food budget with a WIC check for some added basics (most of Hazel's milk, cheese, eggs, juice, and a bit more). Usually, we are "white rice-ing it up" come the end of the month, but during Lent, we are dropping it to $200 - giving the extra $100 away, and learning how to be comfortable with plenty instead of cozy in abundance.