happy new year

A little catch up after the busy holiday season! Hazel took her first car trip to California to see James’ family for thanksgiving. We spent Christmas day here at home with my family. And we really enjoyed celebrating some of the 12 days of Christmas with friends old and new. And now, Hazel is SO close to crawling, she had 4 teeth cut through in this past week (no, I’m not kidding, and she wasn’t very thrilled with it, either!), and she is eating quite a few solid foods, while trying to continue nursing at least a few times a day (if mom can continue standing all 6 teeth!).
James and I started a belated new year’s bet with one another – every day I exercise, he is not allowed to shave his beard. The goal is to get him past the itchy stage and see if he can grow a full beard, and to get me working out (the ‘I just had a baby’ excuse expires after 6 months!). The catch is that we just broke down and got Comcast’s On Demand and DVR, and all I want to do is watch T.V! I guess the double catch is that, with this DVR, we are also able to record and watch at anytime – which also means, after working out! And with On Demand, there are actually really great work out’s in the sports and fitness section, so I have no excuses any longer.
James and I both got new bikes for Christmas (and Hazel got a trailer), and we are trying to get back into cycling. We give each other little opportunities to cycle as mini training since Hazel has to be 12 months to ride in her trailer. It’s awfully hard, when I rode to the store and back the other day, I got off my bike and thought there was an earthquake – my legs were shaking so hard! Even James is puffing harder after a few miles, so we have a lot of work to do, but it will be worth it. Cycling lets you see the world around you, helps you to feel alive, and James loves it, so no harm no foul!
Hazel started crawling last week. She is now moving EVERYWHERE, and it's a little scary. I feel as though there are not enough hours in the day to childproof - and I can hardly leave her for a second without coming back to a cord in her mouth or something! We should have a babyproofing party.....that's all for now, a little catch up!

more coming soon - (i promise!)

opening her first christmas present!

is there a monkey on my back?
(she flipped him up there herself!)

SNOW! 1/15/2008

making your child stuffed animals.....

..... sounds like as much fun as it is, really! Now, I know that this creature (whom we have affectionately named Doug) is not the most beautiful stuffed pet you have ever seen (okay, it's hideous!), however, it is the first of many I will be creating, and I am excited for a new hobby (I only hope my kids, and my friends kids learn to love the little mutts!)!

first foods

Iam seriously not kidding when I say James and I didn't deserve such a spectacular kid. I was a bit (a major bit) of a punk for my folks to deal with, and James wasn't all fun in the park, as it turns out, either. But, somehow, we managed to be gifted with a baby who has slept through the night since 8 weeks old, loves people and doesn't freak out in crowds, has yet to get sick or a diaper rash, loves taking showers with mommy, wakes up in the morning only to entertain herself for up to 40 minutes cooing away at her own baby reflection in her crib mirror, has had teeth for over a month and has yet to attack mommy during a nursing session, and is a massive flirtatious smiler to all people who ask for one (especially strange older women at target). And today, when we decided it would be alright to start giving her a bit or rice cereal for the first time - she not only ate it graciously, but she ate it gracefully! I mixed it with warmed formula - making about a tablespoons worth total, and loaded up the first spoonful. Here I come, ready to watch my daughter freak out, turning her tongue into a backhoe forcing every morsel out and onto her bib. But nope. Not my daughter. She excitedly opens her mouth, and dives forward for the spoon of delicious new adventures awaiting, full of the anticipation of loving food as much as mom and dad seem to. Yep, folks - believe me fully when I say my precious perfect daughter only has rice cereal around her mouth in this picture because mommy couldn't aim the spoon right! She ate EVERY BITE of the bit I made. I can hardly believe it myself. But I can't help but think, what will it be that she finally fights us on? Let's all pray it's picking a college (nice and far away!)!

a letter to my daughter on her baptismal day

This morning was the greatest day of your life, and the second greatest of mine only to the first day I ever saw you. This morning, you were re-born, into the greatest family of all – the family of God. This morning you were baptized, washed with living water, sealed with the Spirit, and marked with the Cross of Christ forever. You have always belonged to God, and through the unfailing nature of God’s promise, God let you know it, God has chosen you! How exciting! How amazing! Today, your baptism was a sign and testimony of God’s grace, awakening, and creating faith. It is now the promises of your father, your God-parents, this new Christian family, and me to nurture your newly developing faith, to encourage your questions and inspire you to think about God’s gifts of grace as precious and yours to share, to support you as you grow and discover the ways God loves and cares for you personally, and to help you learn how to spread God’s love liberally in everything you do and say and are. I look in your giant deep blue eyes, Hazel, and am inspired to teach you this love. To teach you the truest meaning of community, and faith, and trust, and compassion. I live for the day you realize the strength you can receive from the mutual comfort and consolation your brothers and sisters in Christ share with you. And I pray that you will continue in the covenant God made with you this day by participating in the community of Christ, hearing the Word and receiving Christ’s Supper, by proclaiming the good news in word and deed, and by striving for justice and peace in all the world. May you never need to ask me for support, because you’ll always know I’m here, and my love – not unlike Gods – is unconditional, always available, and free.
And guess what else Bean? You are dually blessed with sharing a spiritual birthday with your handsome father! May you always and forever remember how special that is. And, as you blossom into a lovely young woman, and your father continues to grow and challenge his faith, I pray that you two create and keep this day as a special memorial of the blessing you have to be father and daughter.
Nakupenda Hazel – Akubariki (I love you – God bless you).

my (new) personal favorite picture ever!

why don't you wanna play with me?

body image

We all know how, once you have a baby – the focus is on baby, and therefore, how necessary is it really to be pretty again? I mean, your baby is the prettiest thing in the room, and getting all the attention, so why bother with a burp cloth? If she pukes on your shoulder, no one will care because they’re all oohing and ahhing over the little beauty queen, anyway! Yeah, just kidding – that is not an okay place to be. But the opposite is to allow yourself to use your baby as an accessory, and dress her to the nines, use fashionable burp rags, and pack your $150 diaper bag with high end diaper cream, and designer pacifiers. It is a hard walk, being a new mom. And being a stay-at-home-mom doesn’t exactly give you all the same motivation to get back (or just get) into shape like you have when you plan to go back to work. What do I do? I vainly attempt to take a shower every day, and apply mascara and lip-gloss. But the hardest is the clothes. Honestly, the muffin top disaster that is created by jeans worn too low on a post baby belly, squishing in the bum, but allowing the belly all the room in the world to flow freely, is equal in laughability with a new mom’s only other option – the mom jean, worn well about the belly button, with the zipper making your belly look like it has the same crack your backside has. And the way clothing is made to fit today is truly only attractive on a size 6 or below, when the average American woman is a size 12, what is a frumpy new mom to do? I get stuck in silly hooded sweatshirts, with the pocket just big enough to hide my belly, and short sleeves to emphasize the thinnest part of my body – my forearms. I have 2 pairs of jeans that look decent enough the second time I wear them after they come out of the dryer (ie stretch them out of muffin-top phase). But this is ridiculous. I should be allowed to be proud that I have embraced every single thing that my woman body was created to be for me – not constantly worrying about what I should or shouldn’t eat to fit into that adorable little dress at Target of all places. And this isn’t even about being healthy – because there are plenty of very healthy woman bigger than a size 6, and plenty of less than healthy ones below, yet the fight continues in our heads for appropriate body image. Loving that woman of a body, with larger then Target brand bra boobs, and stretch marked skin that should be a symbol of the power my body holds, and the blessing of my child should be easy, simple. But it isn’t for a simple reason. We women judge ourselves against one another instead of embracing our similarities, our power, our individual beauty. I look at other moms pushing strollers, and ask myself why don’t I look like that yet? Or, how long did it take her get there? Yet, as easy as it is to type these thoughts about body image, they aren’t easy to believe. Because, all woman want to be the one pushing the stroller being looked at with those questioning eyes. All women want to be that anomaly of smaller than pre-pregnancy 2 weeks after giving birth. Even – especially me. But, do we even want it more than we want the Reese’s peanut butter cups we bought for “trick-or-treaters” 2 weeks early?

home alone

James is gone this week. He is in Mississippi with a group from church doing hurricane Katrina relief rebuilding work. It is a perfect thing for him to do, and I am so glad he’s willing to use his gifts for this greater good. And, even though I miss him to pieces, I have really done well filling up my stay-at-home-mom time! For those of you who don’t have kids and don’t understand, let me fill you in. once you have a baby, you have all these aspirations to be active, and hang out with other moms, and learn so much about your baby in the midst of this perfectly set up schedule. Doesn’t happen. Well, at least for me. I don’t know any people in Issaquah with kids, anymore. And it certainly is easy to sit at home playing with Hazel, all the while watching (straight in a row) the View, Ellen, E News, Martha, Tyra, and the Cosby Show! What’s even more difficult is leaving the room, for small portions of time, to switch over the laundry, empty the dishwasher, go to the bathroom, you know. But, leaving the house can be the worst. Make sure she’s not hungry, has a clean diaper, the diaper bag is packed, you have enough burp cloths, you have enough spit-up/poop-explosion changes of clothes, you are going to be in a nursing “safe” place when she starts screaming, and I could go on and on. Thinking about going out with a friend who doesn’t have a baby? Think harder about all of the above. But, God is looking out for us lonely girls this week. Monday, we played at Grandma’s house, then stopped in to visit Hazel’s newest best friend Matilda (and mom’s old bf Rebecca). Tuesday, we met Grandma in Seattle for lunch, went to Hazel’s first TEDDY study appointment (wait for that blog later!), and then went to our childbirth preparation class reunion and met all the babies, as well as gathered other stay-at-home-moms’ numbers! Tomorrow, we have a play date, a lunch date, and a dinner date. Thursday and Friday, we have dinner dates, too, plus a play date Friday afternoon! As much as I don’t usually get done during the weeks, look at all the excitement we get this one week! So, what’s next you ask? It’s time to find an Issaquah stroller brigade, or mom and baby pilates class (4 months is about as long as one can allow oneself to still look at maternity pants as maybe okay to wear out of the house!!)!

finally

I feel so good now that we have finally found a church. I say finally in 2 different tones. The first is the finally meaning, yea – we know, we don’t go to church regularly, and haven’t for oh, about 2 years, we are lazy and enjoy sleeping. Who really wants to get all involved with a congregation all over again – from scratch – and really, what is church for? My relationship with God is just great here from between my flannel sheets, electric blanket, and down comforter, not to mention how fun it is to channel surf between the old 80’s flicks full of hysterical sex scenes, and evangelical preachers sending me to hell. And the other finally, meaning once we [finally] started searching for the perfect place for our budding new family, we practically had to look under rocks to find a place that at least tried to share the LOVE OF GOD with EVERYONE. We almost started thinking we had a different bible from these people. But then, some friends told us about this church that would be perfect for us. By this point, our bean was 1 ½ months old which, in our Lutheran tradition, was getting a bit past her ‘infant baptism’ prime (not to mention growing out of the family baptismal gown!) and we were getting hungry for that Lutheran fellowship again. Way past hungry. So, we went – slightly skeptical of the white middle upper class suburban neighborhood it was set in (I know, I know, if you could take back thoughts…) and fell in love. The first week, the pastor’s sermon drew us further up and further in. The second week we were completely surrounded by people with babies under 12 months old. And the third week we were invited to an infant/toddler Sunday school class. And now, Sunday morning – we can’t get out of our flannel sheets, electric blanket, and down comforter fast enough, stick the 80’s flicks on our Netflix list, and retire the wacko Pentecostal preachers for solid Lutheran theology. And the best part about all this? A young mom and dad found a place to worship wholly again, and their baby girl (and, sheepishly her folks, too) have a place full of peers to challenge and be challenged by in the years they can grow in faith together – because that is what church is for. Finally.

so i've never done something like this before....

... and i'm a little intimidated. but it can't be that hard, can it? and besides, it might even make me a better communicator to all these friends i have long since lost now that my mind is usually elsewhere - lost in babyland!

hazel kathryn is now 17 weeks old. not quite 4 months, since 4 weeks don't always (or even usually) equal 1 month, but evidentally old enough to get teeth - surprise surprise. yes, she popped out number 1 (front bottom right) last sunday, followed ever so swiftly by number 2 (front bottom left) on tuesday. and just in time for halloween - she's our little jack-o-lantern! don't fret, she has yet to sharpen them on me, but i'm sure that dreaded story won't be long to wait for.

hazel (whom we also affectionately call bean) also decided that passing the 3 month mark should also mean rolling over. well, sortof. she rolled tummy to back, back to tummy, left side, right side, and a few more practices before she decided she was over that - and moved on to continuous chitter chatter. all day, every day. but at least it's still cute - wait for that blog later :-)

well folks, here i go - awkwardly, yet commitedly starting this thing! here's hoping it's wonderful!